Portrait by Claudia Langenegger

Mättu from Gümmenen, near Bern, has been living with HIV since late 2018. At the time, he was undergoing inpatient treatment at a clinic due to a life crisis.
"It was actually a good thing — I felt well cared for and supported," he says.
His diagnosis mainly sparked activism:
"I wanted to know everything about HIV and really educated myself."
He became involved in advocacy groups and found a valuable companion in Werner, his peer from Aids-Hilfe Bern — someone with whom he could talk openly about everything related to HIV.

The fact that 38-year-old Mättu was able to approach “his HIV” with such self-assurance also has roots in another major step: coming out as gay ten years earlier.
“Back then, I learned to own who I am,” he says. “It was a real liberation. Before that, I was leading a double life that nearly broke me.”

Coming out in 2008 and the HIV diagnosis in 2018 marked two stages of self-acceptance:
“Both at once would’ve definitely been too much.”

Mättu lives in a devout environment in a rural area — a setting many might assume leads to fear of stigma and secrecy. But for him, the reality is different:
“I’ve never experienced any negative reactions or exclusion. I feel very comfortable living in the countryside and don’t feel exposed,” says the Bernese native.
“But I’m also open and honest about my HIV status and my homosexuality.”
There’s a rainbow doormat outside his front door, and anyone who wants to know about his HIV status is welcome to ask.

In 2008, he joined the Methodist Church, where he found a spiritual home.
“Christian communities aren’t only made up of fundamentalists — there are also progressive people,” he says — those who live by the Christian principle of loving your neighbor.

His sexuality and sexual experience haven’t changed since his HIV diagnosis.
“Because I knew immediately that U = U: thanks to treatment, the virus is undetectable and I can’t transmit it,” Mättu explains. That knowledge has allowed him and his partner to enjoy a fear-free sex life.

Last summer brought another major change: Mättu underwent gastric surgery. His weight dropped from 135 to 78 kilograms in just six months.
“The day of the surgery feels like my second birthday,” he says happily.
“Now I finally feel completely comfortable in my body again.”